When the universe chooses life over success….

Over the course of my life I have been blessed, but being blessed doesn’t me that it has been easy, but definitely blessed.

We have to go back a few years in time to understand what this is about,

So let’s go back just to 2014 the birth of my youngest son and the announcement soon after that the commonwealth games would be in 2018 on the Gold Coast-QLD-Australia.

I have always been a bit of a fitness lover, mostly hiking, swimming, and some more hiking and yoga just for the relaxing benefits and the stretching.

We had decided that four children were enough for us and choose that we wouldn’t have anymore and after waiting for what I deemed a suitable timeframe after having a baby to start training I threw myself into training for the 5000mtrs for the Comm Games.

I had allowed myself 6 months after having my now 9-year-old and started slowly training up and down the road, increasing my times and getting faster and faster.

Yoga to help combat the usual strains and help recovery I was now nearly 12 months into training and my time was just over 17 minutes for the 5000.

I was signed up for NSW athletics and looking forward to the year’s competitions to get into the selection teams.

One day, as I was feeling great so for the last 200 meters down the home straight I really pushed, pushed so hard that I felt something give in my hips.

I was slowed to barely a baby step and I knew this wasn’t good.

Let’s face it, when you have grown up with injuries and multiple things happening you know it’s bad.

I limped home and Stuart was there smiling with a “Wow, that was quick” Then his smile dropped and he came out to help me in.

The doctor got me in quickly and off I went, scanned, poked, prodded, and diagnosed.

I had severe bursitis in my left hip and once the physical checked me over, I was told this was going to be a LONG recovery.

Now, I have had a few. BAD whiplash incidents, I have the middle of my spine filled with arthritis from some sort of “accident” that I can tell you how, I have torn both rotator cuffs and the left one twice… and a few extras that happened.. so physical pain isn’t a big issue for me.

After what seemed like an eternity of physio visits and gentle exercise we hit mid-2015. I had realized that there was NO WAY I would ever get back to what I was running at considering I was to keep taking it easy for another 12 months minimum.

When I say easy, I mean just bouncing slowly up and down as I move forward at less than a baby could… talk about mental pain… this was something that was hard for me.

But then the universe took over, I was teaching yoga gently and had explained to those that I taught that I couldn’t do what the magazines showed and that my form of yoga is functional, not aesthetic. So they were happy to move forward as I got stronger and I could guide others from harmful experiences by being raw with them.

Stuart and I decided that since I wasn’t going to compete we should have another baby. So we did.

Our youngest daughter was born in 2016, I taught yoga while pregnant with all our children but this one was different she was a little butterfly.

After a full-on operation while 4 months pregnant with her and being diagnosed with Crohn’s disease it took its toll on me.

I did keep teaching until the doctor actually told me I needed to stop or I could have a premmie baby.

That was enough for me, I would do anything for all my kids and that was enough to make me stop.

I went back and taught kettlebells and yoga for a while until 2018 when my own health was struggling and I was becoming burnt out.

Thank goodness I did this because I have been able to find that wonderful place where I could homeschool these four wonderful kids.

Where I could get in touch with those super crazy, out-of-control feelings that I kept buried for my entire life.

Where I was able to just be more me than EVER before in my life.

I had unlearned so many things, no one but I needs to validate how I feel.

That my health is something I needed to take control of.

That I needed to deepen my study of yoga and with a little friendly guidance I started teaching again.

I like everyone else still have to deal with the upcoming perimenopause, hormones, and temper flares.. but I have been blessed beyond measure that the universe gave me the shove I needed and helped me on a track that I didn’t think I needed.

We don’t ever think that what we do is destructive to our souls, but when we get a push and learn to quieten our ego we can hear the universe talking, and no matter what pain we feel, physically, spiritually, or mentally that guidance is extremely important.

Thanks for reading, hopefully, something I have shared resonates and can help you listen to that inner voice, universe, or spirit that guides you.